


Stargazer

by Ava_Aasimar



Category: Hololive, Holostars, Virtual Streamer Animated Characters
Genre: Gen, Homesickness, Introspection, astel deserves more love and if i'm the one whoneeds to make it then so be it, first fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-17 17:56:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29845296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ava_Aasimar/pseuds/Ava_Aasimar
Summary: How much more do I have to lose before my heart is forgiven?How much more pain must I suffer before I can see you once again?Trapped by memories I can't choose my next direction.(Check notes for links to the inspo videos!)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 16





	Stargazer

Astel leans on the balcony of his apartment, looking at the surprisingly starry sky above him. Normally it’s hard to see the stars from human cities, but tonight is especially clear, the cloudless sky letting a few shimmering dots poke through the blanket of light pollution. One of those tiny dots might his home, he muses. Astel tunes out the bustling streets below him as he becomes lost in his first memories on this planet.

When he was originally found by that man, clothes and hair sticky-stiff from sea water, he had lied. Well, it wasn’t exactly a lie, he did have some slight amnesia. He didn’t remember anything between his ship crashing into the ocean his coming to, but his memories were more complete than he had let on. His ship had been sent to conquer Earth by the Empire of Nephelomachio and yet they had been brought down by a simple mechanical failure, one he would never know the origins of. To think he, a child of the supreme leader and lord of multiple planets, would be brought low on his first campaign… Even if he returned to his homeworld, his prospects were uninspiring. At best he would be stripped of his titles and disowned by the Leda clan. At worst- no, it’s too frightful to think of. Better to reminisce about the past and focus on the present than worry about his future on a world he was probably never getting back to.

What a world it was, so different from Earth in so many ways. The people, the culture, even the terrain of his home differed greatly from what could be found on Earth. Even now, over a year after he was left stranded here he can distinctly remember the sights and sounds of his home. He will probably never again get to wake up to the calls of feathered serpents echoing around the mountains his clan has called home for centuries. And how he misses his clan… they weren’t family, not exactly, not like he considers Ollie and some of the other members of Hololive, but he still misses them. He misses the comfort foods he now has neither the ingredients nor the proficiency to make without a chef. He misses the cosmetics from home, made from pigments that just don’t have an equivalent on Earth, or at least not one he has found yet; he even misses the dull droning of his tutors teaching him about the rebellion of such-and-such planet or the treaty of some star system, all for “the sake of his success” or to “guarantee his future with the empire”. Ah yes, the future he would have after somehow escaping this mud ball populated by fragile meat sacks. Astel closes his eyes and lets out a loud sigh as he sets himself down on the ground, his back sliding down the metal railing he had been leaning against. Opening his eyes once more, he finds that the stars have been hidden from sight by a layer of clouds. So much for looking back. His eyes feel damp… it must be the rain. It would seem that Earth is intent on stealing his past as it has his future.

Thinking about it, it’s a miracle he even has a future at all. He’s lucky the crash and seawater didn’t short out his universal translator or crack his energy core. His life on earth would have been very short if he hadn’t been able to communicate with these Earthlings- no. Humans, that’s the word they use for themselves. He’s grown to like the people of this planet as time went on, with their movies and games; the sheer amount of entertainment available to common people had shocked him at first. How can the people of this planet get anything done when there are so many distractions around them? Over time he thinks he’s figured it out: humans are very team-oriented creatures. If given the choice between entertaining themselves and helping one of their own, 7 times out of 10 they choose to help, and the three that don’t will feel guilty all the while. That’s another thing Astel appreciates about humans: their capacity to feel guilty for doing something they consider bad. If all species had that intrinsic ability, he decides, the Nephelomachio would have fallen long ago.

Would… would that have been such a bad thing? He doesn’t exactly have anything to go back to, and being here, living among the humans, he’s gained a few… habits? Inclinations? Something like that. Recently he’s been feeling emotions he’d thought unique to humans: joy whenever others are happy, sadness at the sadness of others, fear for something not really threatening… Any emotion he felt for someone other than himself had been a new experience he hadn’t anticipated. He must be learning from these humans, he figures. Learning from Roberu’s boundless and infectious cheer, from Tenma’s glee and horror that shift like the flick of a switch, and from the deep sadness and frustration Izuru packs into his music… He’s glad.

His phone vibrates inside his pocket, snapping him out of his musings. He wipes his eyes to read the message he just received, a reminder from Oga about the next HoloUters stream tonight. It’s probably mostly intended for Tenma, but he’s thankful for it all the same and reacts with a cute star emoji. His legs feel stiff from sitting on cold hard concrete and his arms are stinging a bit from the cold spring air, so the warmth of his apartment is a blessing. Astel quickly prepares himself some green tea, taking care to add some honey to the drink. Stars know he’ll need it at some point tonight. He sits down at his computer desk ready to join his friends for a chaotic good time. He had been complaining earlier in the evening, but in the end he really does love this new world.

**Author's Note:**

> So... yeah! I really like Astel and he really deserves more love (tho tbh all the holostars do). This fic is the result of me finding a translated clip of the little backstory/acting segment at the beginning of his debut stream (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqsaqNzFtxQ) and then watching his One More Time, One More Chance cover for the first time directly afterwards. At like 2 AM. Safe to say I instantly wanted to read a fic about Astel being homesick, only to look at the tag and find nothing. Our Pretty Baby Boy deserves all the love in the world and this fic is how I show mine. I hope y'all enjoyed!


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